1. |
Dinner Date
01:42
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The steak was coarse
Of course,
You noticed first
Rehearsed a way
to tell the chef
And my critique?
I couldn’t speak.
You screeched at them
As I called the cab
The driver was grizzled
And gleefully swiveled
Through chasms of cars
As he chuckled offhand
And as we got home
You abducted my phone
And probed the device
Like some cold alien
While you re-read my texts
I’ll just head to bed
and spread my thoughts
Across the linen thread
As I fall asleep
My temper recedes
And exchanges itself
For an endless descent
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2. |
Mind Like Mine
02:17
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Out of sight
And out of mind
Doesn’t jive with a
Mind like mine
I always see-eee
It clear
All the reasons
You’re not here:
I become Icarian
And start to melt
So I swallowed my
Wings of wax
Took a breathe
And a heart attack
It always see-seems
So clear
Towards the sun
When you’re flying near
Out of sight and out of mind
Doesn’t fix being left behind
I hope you finally climb that wall
As I fall from the ledge
You stand tall
I may be
heartbroken
But its both a virtue
and A curse
for what its worth
I’ve been crying
since my birth
But if youre starting to
grow weary of
My teary eyes
my deary
You can leave me
But me clear
I’m gonna follow you
Until I disappear
Out of sight and out of mind
Doesn’t jive with a mind like mine
Out of sight and out of mind
Doesn’t jive with a mind like mine
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3. |
Good As Dead
02:55
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What good is crying
When you’ll soon be dying?
Take a casket
And pack it with clove
I just need the luck
So pray I’m good enough
To travel up as my
Lungs decompose
And you can remove
the bones from my body
And throw me to a mound
of skin on the ground
a husk
you can stuff
With straw and fluff
To string up
When you want me around
I used to see angels
Peculiar angles of color
Would peek from ground
I found out they were
light beams and
Soon, gave up fighting
Thinking no one is around
to watch me drown
I want you to dance
on my grave
One day
Use it as new place
To celebrate
I’m happy enough
As I turn to dust
And curl up into
A memory you’ve made
His frigid eyes
The frantic goodbyes
And the chorus lines
Exit my head
She’ll start to weep
As I fall asleep
A slumber deep
enough to be
good,
As dead
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4. |
Pigeon Neck
02:10
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You make me gleam
Like a pidgeon neck
Magenta, green,
and red
spread
And extends onto the color
Of my cheeks
As I’m starving for
the crumbs at
Your feet
All I need
Is a solid
night of sleep
Without your arms
Strangling me
Let me dream
And figure out
The mess I’ll have
To clean
And throw
a little loving
At me
And I know I make it hard,
hard for you
But I’m swinging with a heart
in two
The severity never occurred to me
The clarity is earned ya see
So I’ll earn his one for me
And one for you
Cuz you make me gleam
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5. |
Mother/Souvenir
01:34
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In your sorrow
As you built your tomb
I learned to grow
An empty womb
I’m not smarter than
the things I feel
And I couldn’t flower
Til you bloomed
I’m your daughter
Not your souvenir
Still I feel just like you do
I’m your daughter
Not your souvenir
And I didn’t know
I was growing
Into you
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6. |
Interlude
01:46
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7. |
Disappointment Room
02:31
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What a lovely disappointment room
A window just for me
So I can see the world I’m missing
As I sit back wishing I was
Just like you
Or someone less than me
Someone who actually agrees
With all the
Nice quant pictures
The you hang on the wall
With all the nice pretty faces
And a single screwball
That’s what I’m called
A single flaw
To shame em all
So I climb the walls
And walk the halls
And hope one day
I vanish warts and all
I’m a rotten and fermented fruit
Im juicy for a drink to make your
Thinking less cohesive
Yet I know that juice
Is just eroding you
I wish I were in bloom
But baby thats just not my tune
Cuz I was born
In the nighttime
With an unforgiving moon
And then I crawled
To the daylight and
Became the cloud of doom
Thats what I do
A source of gloom,
Thats just what I do
Better yet ill just my
Flesh join up
With the walls
And the halls
Of a disappointment room
What a lovely disappointment room
A window just for me
So I can see the world I’m missing
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8. |
A Lily in Mid Bloom
05:00
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I bought myself flowers today
and pretended you sent them
A lily in mid-bloom
As the roses rot
Across my room
And somehow all I can do
is think of you
You and all your pretty words
That bliss
Before it burned
Patiently waiting for my turn
Praying one day you’d learn
What you’ve done to me
(Back on the august night
Back when my eyes could still
Dance in your light
I remember by all those
Clever fucking ways you
would try
to make me cry)
It’s a shame we never made it
To Valentines Day
I’m not ashamed to say
I prayed that’d be the day
When you’d to your senses and say
“I love you”
“Im sorry”
“I truly know what I did”
Would I have given in
If you ever gave me a reason
To forgive?
But now,
the bouquet
Just decays
On my nightstand
Where I left them
And its growing
harder for me to pretend
that you ever would have sent them
So stop and smell the flowers!
Won’t you see how much they’ve died?
Can’t you realize
That you’re the one who stole
that very glimmer from my eyes?
And
If I had a dime
For every time
I wondered “Why
you had to do it?”
“And if Im the one who blew it?”
If you were right
If I just blinking into the gaslight
If I was just your waste of time
(I think we can keep going with this part and write more and escalate this bridge)
Then I remember when you said
I look pathetic when I beg
And all those things you never said
All those things you “never said”
All of the things you never said
I remember them
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9. |
Exequy
04:45
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You gave me no warning
To go into mourning
As quickly as you’d disappear
It cuts like a knife
The empty corners of my life
You occupied back
When you were still here
But I dont get to throw you a funeral
Not while I blow in the snow and windfall
Of the life you still lead
After leaving me
To grieve
But that’s not what haunts me
It’s your kindness in the memories
And the agony builds a symphony as the rhythm
Continues to bruise
So I strike a chord for
An absent lord in
Pursuit of a happier tune
But the ember of the memory
Burns me ya clutch it
And I feel every sting
Of your warmth
when I touch it
But it’s better than freezing
Or trying to reason
What I once thought
Just could not be true
The exequy
of you
And believe me I tried
To we from your side
Go find an alibi
Suitable for me
But it ages like wine
And the flavor refines
And reminds me of the
The boy you used to be
But there’s no use
in trying
To savor a flavor
Gone rotten
To remember
the taste of
The sweetness
Forgotten
And the agony
Builds a symphony
As the rhythm
Continues to bruise
So I Stirke a chord
For an absent lord
In oursuit of a happier tune
But there’s no use
In trying to pry out
A lie to provide me
A happier view
And the darks of my eyes
And the bones,
I call thighs,
Mark a time when I
Let my soul stew
Fore I’ll grow
past the rot
And this little song will not
Change the
permanent mark
Of your bruise
And I’ll grow
past the rot
And your bruises will
Soften and stick
Like a wicker tattoo
In my exequy of you
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10. |
Pearl Door
04:16
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Seems you broke me down
Found the perfect vein to jab at
Watched my soul pour out
Still I knock at the door saying
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
I’ve cried enough to times to know
It never lasts long enough to lose my breath
But if I go before I wanna go
Hold m up against the door
And scream
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
You can beat me while im down
If you choose to
You can bleed me til my bones are dry
And I could turn the other cheek
But I refuse to
I prefer to look you
Right between the eye
Saying
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in
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11. |
Outro
01:59
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Nussy Andrews New York, New York
Nussy Andrews is a singer songwriter based in NYC.
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